


The Phone Call

by butterflysandbullets, jlillymoon, Little_Red_Hot_Riding_Hood



Category: MorMor - Fandom, Sherlock (TV), Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
Genre: Angst, Asylums, Confessions, Cutting, Emotional, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Hospitalization, Hospitals, Implied Childhood Sexual Abuse, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Torture, Loneliness, Long Distance Relationship, Love Confessions, M/M, Mental Breakdown, Mental Health Issues, Mental Institutions, Nurses, Pain, Phone Call, Phone Calls & Telephones, Self Confidence Issues, Self-Harm, You Are My Sunshine, childhood song, emotional breakdown, house arrest, mental health, mormor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-27
Updated: 2015-06-27
Packaged: 2018-04-06 11:28:23
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,881
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4219983
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/butterflysandbullets/pseuds/butterflysandbullets, https://archiveofourown.org/users/jlillymoon/pseuds/jlillymoon, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Little_Red_Hot_Riding_Hood/pseuds/Little_Red_Hot_Riding_Hood
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A one time phone call between Sebastian Moran and James Moriarty after they met and were separated for some time.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Phone Call

**Author's Note:**

> Continuing in our universe, this is a transcript of the phone call between Jim who is hospitalized in a psychiatric unit in Ireland and Sebastian who is under house arrest at Eton when they are both 16.

Sebastian looked both ways down the deserted hallway before lifting the ancient telephone receiver into his hand. He was sure that he was alone, but being under house arrest was already grating on his nerves and he didn’t need to be in more trouble with anyone. He dialed the number he had memorized, hoping that all the arrangements had been met. He didn’t care why he was calling in the middle of the night, just that he was.

 

All of Sebastian’s careful plans to steal away to Dublin had been cancelled. All because his father found the letter. The blasted letter that the mysterious A sent. The letter that shattered Sebastian’s world.

 

But there was one single shining line in the whole brief missive. “Please call. He needs to hear your voice. You may be the only one to help him now.” It was what Sebastian needed to hear. That Jim needed him.

 

The static across the line brought him back to his thoughts and he worried his left thumb nail as the double ring of the phone crackled in his ear. He held his breath when the ringing stopped and a slightly nasal voice answered.

 

“St. Edmundsbury Hospital. Angela speaking. How many I help you?” the voice droned as if she had said these words thousands of times over.

 

“Yes” Sebastian's voice cracked a bit. He cleared his throat and tried again. “Yes, hello. I am looking to speak to Jim Moriarty.”

 

The silence from the other end of the phone was deafening to Sebastian and he shifted on his feet. His nerves were worse than they had ever been. He hoped that he was not getting Jim into any trouble himself and worried that this was all for naught.

 

Sebastian strained his ear to listen as he heard shuffling feet and whispered conversation from across the sea. He heard the slight sing song quality of the Irish Brogue and hoped that it was Jim that he was going to speak to next. There was a bit of noise as if someone was moving the telephone and then a slow exhale across the line. Sebastian waited for anything before he gave in and spoke.

“Jim?” his voice was quiet and scared, one name bringing forward all his concern for himself and the other. His heart was racing and his palms were damp with moisture.

 

There was no reply from the other side of the call. Sebastian noticed and decided that no matter what, he was going to talk. Even if that meant Jim didn’t. He took in a deep breath and let his tongue loose.

 

“Jim, I know you can hear me and I understand if you can’t or won’t speak to me. I mean, the… the last couple of letters and then me not being able to come and a lot has happened. I… I…” he stuttered for a moment before pausing to catch his breath. “I am under house arrest. I don’t know when I’ll be able to get another letter out to you if at all. My… my father.” Sebastian closed his eyes and felt the pricks of tears in the back of his throat.

 

“It doesn’t matter what my father did.” Sebastian answered his own pause. “What does matter is that I got the other letter, the one from the friend of yours who said that I could call you now and that we could talk, even if it’s for a few minutes. I… I hope this is alright? That I called, that is.”

 

Sebastian listened for anything from the other side of the line, but was only met with a small sigh, one that spoke volumes to him. He decided that he would just continue to talk and when Jim was ready to say something he would.

 

“I was worried. Very worried about the letters covered in blood. But I knew that if you were writing me it was fine. That you were fine. At least I hoped you were. And I hated the fact there was nothing I could do to help… that I couldn’t be there…. to...I don’t know what I would have done. And now… Now I can’t be there. I can’t even go into to town to buy a pack of fags. I have to bribe someone to do it for me. And I can’t call my mother or my sister. I… I’m worried about you Jim. I’m worried that you aren’t well… I’m scared too. So fucking scared. I’m scared this will be the last time I will talk to you and that the moment I… this call ends, my heart will shatter into a million pieces.”

 

Sebastian finally slid down the wall and sat on the floor, holding his head in his free hand, waiting and wishing for something from Jim. He needed to hear his voice. Needed to know that Jim was still there in some way. Needed to... something. Some sort of recognition before he himself went off the deep end.

 

Sebastian moved his hand to his thighs and ran his fingertips over the tender flesh there. A constant reminder that pain brought better focus and focus brought clarity. And he needed clarity like he needed air.

 

There was another soft sigh before a voice sounded on the line. “Seb..” It was Jim but it was weak and sounded so exhausted. “I..I’m sorry. I just..I don’t know what happened..how’d..I’m so happy to hear your voice again.”

 

Jim wanted to cry when he’d been told he had a phone call. He knew Ashling had promised that she’d get ahold of Seb..but he hadn’t believed her. He hadn’t believed anything..not even his own mind. He hated it in the hospital and he was going to die there, he was sure about that. He let out a small whimper as he shifted. The movement pulling the stitches in his back from the new treatment he’d received that day.

 

Sebastian’s heart both rose and sank at the sound of Jim’s voice across the line. He choked back a small sob as he listened to the sad and tired taint to Jim’s words. He was sure that Jim wouldn’t want to speak to him again and he felt the world tilting slightly as he felt his mind clear for the first time in days.

 

“Not as happy as I am to hear yours.” Sebastian managed to say. “I… I’m happy that this… we could… I know it’s only a few minutes. But... I… the world seems so black right now. And I’m just glad to know you are….” Words were failing Sebastian and he worried his thumb again as he tried to compose a better sentence in his head.

 

“Seb..Sebby I promise things will get better for you.” Jim said softly knowing that they would. Thing could only get better for Sebastian. Jim was sure he was going to die there, lost and forgotten from the world, especially if his father had his way. “You’ll find a bit of sunshine somewhere.”

 

“Sunshine….” Sebastian mused. “ I had my sunshine once.”  Sebastian looked at his watch. He had five more minutes before the patrol circled back through the hall where he was. He could play his out of bed on needing the loo since his father downgraded his room to one without a private bath, but he had to tell Jim.

 

“I have only a few minutes left.” He stuttered out. “I… I miss you, my sunshine.”

 

“I...I miss you too, Sebastian.” Jim said his voice cracking and tears starting to form in his eyes as he let the nurse push him down under the desk to hide him from one of the guards passing by. He waited until she made gave him a smile and nod before he spoke again. “I miss you so much it hurts and I know...I know I won’t get to see you again...just don’t ever forget me please...I...I love you.”

 

Sebastian’s eyes now flowed freely with tears as Jim uttered the three words he longed to hear the most. “Don’t say that… I…. I will find a way.” Sebastian sobbed out quietly. He drew in a deep breath. “I... I love you Jim.”

 

Sebastian felt the world closing in around him, his vision blurring a bit at the edges. His hand ran across his thigh, the stinging pain bringing him back. He took his last few minutes and decided to do one last thing… one last thing for Jim.

 

Sebastian stood up from the floor and holding onto the wall he turned his body so that his back was to the hall. It was a dangerous stance, exposed, but he didn’t care. He wanted all the privacy he could muster. This was for Jim and Jim only. No one would be able to take it from him. Ever.

 

“You are my sunshine. My only sunshine.” his voice whispered across the line, rough with grief and pained from the tears caught in his throat. “You make me happy, when skies are grey. You never know dear, how much I love you…” his breath caught and he couldn’t say the last words.

 

Jim let out a soft sob as Sebastian stopped singing. “I love you..I love you so much..thank you for making me so happy.” he said softly. “Please don’t forget me..don’t ever forget me.”

 

Jim’s sob grabbed Sebastian’s heart and squeezed it. He let out a low painful moan as he responded. “I love you too. God, I love you. I… I will never forget you. I’ll… I’ll figure something out.” Sebastian stilled, hearing the distant footsteps of the guards. He closed his eyes and let out a breath. “I have to go…. think of me….I… I love you.” he whispered quickly as he hung up the phone and turned into the hall proper.

 

Sebastian managed three steps before his heart stuttered and his lungs constricted just enough to blacken the edges of his world. He didn’t register the way his face skidded slightly on the wool of the persian runner or the drops of blood mingling with his tears as he lost consciousness and hit the floor.

 

Jim let out another sob as he handed the phone back to the nurse who got down on the floor with him after hanging up the handset. It was a small comfort to Jim to have her wrap her arms around him in a hug. He knew she would have to help get him back to his room. Tomorrow would be a new day and a new round of treatments to cure the demon child. More pain...but all he could think of and hear was Sebastian's voice singing in his ear.

 

Sebastian awoke to an unfamiliar room, his leg bandaged tightly and his head pained. His face felt as if he had rubbed it raw with glass but all he could feel was the break in his heart. He turned his head to see the kind motherly nurse who resided in his house sitting next to him. She moved her chair closer to him and held him as he sobbed into her handsome chest, his cries only broken with two words. “My angel.”

 

 

**Author's Note:**

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